I’m happy.

I worry a lot about things that don’t need to be worried about. I’ll be studying for a test and I’ll be almost in tears over the fact that I can’t get everything in my head and my dad will walk in and say “This is what happens every time, you worry about this stuff and in the end it all turns out alright.”

And every time, he’s completely right.

If you read my previous post you’ll know that I was EXTREMELY nervous about going back to school after two weeks off. It was going to be my first face-to-face social interaction in fourteen days, swimming had been replaced by something else and I didn’t know what sport was going to replace it at the time (I love swimming, by the way) and I had a big biology test on two chapters of the lesson.

So you can understand why I was stressed.

But yeah, it turns out that everything WAS alright. No awkward social interaction was engaged, swimming had been replaced with badminton (and I was teamed with a rather cute funny guy, so that was nice) and I managed to answer every question on the test. The quality of said answers, however, is another matter XD

That was Monday. And at the end of the day I thought “Ok, that was a stroke of luck. Tomorrow is when the shit’s gonna start.”

Right now it’s Tuesday evening, and in all honesty, today was rather relaxing too. I only had four hours of lessons (unfortunately they were spread out across the day so I could only leave an hour early -_- better than none, I guess) and for three full hours I had absolutely nothing, so me and my fellow nerds (that makes it sound like I’m part of a friend group. Nah, there’s only 3 of us. Well, I suppose that’s a group, by definition) went and sat on the nearby football stadium chairs, talked about gay OTPs and listened to music. Pretty sure we weren’t allowed to go up on the stadium chairs, but it was raining and the chairs were sheltered soooo…. XD 

But I think the highlight of today was getting back in touch with an old friend that I missed a lot, and I thought our friendship had ended a while ago. And I’m only two days into the week, but I already know that nothing will be able to top that. No contest.

This is no actual point to this post, by the way XD I just felt like sharing the fact that for the first time in a while, I can completely say without a shadow of a doubt that I’m happy. I mean, I’ve been happy before, I’m generally a happy person, but often there would be a lingering bad feeling at the back of my mind. For once, I don’t feel anything bad creeping up on me. Well, either I don’t or I do but it’s smaller than usual XD 

So yeah. I’m happy.

Thank you for putting up with my rambling until the end ^^ ❤️


Last day of freedom

I go back to school tomorrow, and I am not looking forward to it at all. Then again, who would? You’ve been able to sit and relax and watch countless anime series at home for two weeks, who would be happy about having all that stopped?

That reminds me, I need to continue watching Kokoro Connect.

The lessons themselves don’t bother me that much. Although, sport could be better; we’re supposed to be doing swimming but the pool is closed tomorrow for cleaning which means we’ll probably be doing gym instead. If I had swimming tomorrow I’d actually be, dare I say it, looking forward to school (I’m a swimming nerd), but gym and any other land-based physical activity are horrible. To me, anyway. So the fact that swimming is being replaced by one of those activities makes me so happy wow 

The fact that I have two hours of French with genderbent Satan is pretty shit too. Fortunately she’s just the substitute for our actual prof who should be coming back in about two weeks *hallelujah*

Apart from those two things, the lessons I have tomorrow aren’t what’s bothering me. It’s the people. Whether it be the other students or the profs, I just don’t like being around people. I literally only have like 6 or 7 irl friends, only two of which I hang out with, none of which I hang out with at all times because we have different classes.

I’m like the child of Haruka Nanase and Tomoko Kuroki. That’s not a good thing xD

Idk if anyone is ever going to read this and I honestly don’t mind, I just need somewhere I can talk without fear of stuttering or mispronouncing something or forgetting a word (all of which happen often. This shows just how little I talk irl xD)

Thank you for putting up with my rant until the end ^-^ ❤️